July 2018 Update

An update from Nicole to Taylor explaining things that have happened so far over the summer break since the hospital Hey, I just wanted to give you an update of what has been happening over the past few months. I sort of just put everything that has been happening in here just to explain everything, … Continue reading July 2018 Update

10/20/18

10/20/18 Explanation and Thoughts of Recent Events Addressed to Nicole's counselor Here is an explanation of everything that has happened prior to my hospitalization, what happened the night of, what happened during my stay, and what has happened afterwards. As for what happened leading up to being there, it started about three weeks ago, when … Continue reading 10/20/18

The Painful Wait Continues

Thursday, April 26, 2018 7:00 pm A nurse comes out to them and tells them they now have a room ready. Nicole's mind continues to spin as she sees her captivity is only steps away. She looks one last time at the sliding doors before she follows the nurse back to a room in the … Continue reading The Painful Wait Continues

Remembering and Missing

TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARM One, two, three, … seventeen.I count the healing wounds on my skin.I trace each one with my fingers,feeling the ridges and creases of pink discolored scars.I rub each one tenderly,remembering and missing the pain of each one opening,the nostalgia of each cut made. Again, I rub my healing wrist, promising myself … Continue reading Remembering and Missing

Silencing Her Mind

TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARM Thoughts whip and beat around her mind;the urges pull at her, pleading,“Just one cut, just one slice;”they beg, “just one please.”She rolls back her sleeve, runs her fingers across the ridges of old cuts,the dried bloody lines, the peeling broken skin,the rough calloused scars.Her wrist stares up at her, Scarred and … Continue reading Silencing Her Mind

The Wait

Nicole and the officer pull out of the parking lot with Taylor close behind them. They make the twenty minute drive to the emergency room in Rottingdam. The officer drives all the way up to door to drop Nicole off while Taylor parks. Nicole stands there at the doors waiting, feeling awkward and out of … Continue reading The Wait

Pray For Me?

Thursday, April 26, 2018 Nicole takes out her phone and responds to the messages she has received from her friends, Marie, Leigha, and Matt. Matt saw the message she sent to the group chat and is concerned. The previous times she asked for prayers like this, it was on late nights when she was struggling … Continue reading Pray For Me?

The Final Session

TRIGGER WARNINGThursday, April 26, 2018 3:00 p.m. Nicole is sitting in the counseling center waiting to go back into her counselor’s office. She is very nervous as this will be her last session with Taylor, and she doesn’t know how well she will handle the summer without a clinician. She’s been more depressed and anxious … Continue reading The Final Session

Sharing My Dark Thoughts

TRIGGER WARNING Thursday, April 12, 2018 It’s 10:45 a.m. on a sunny April Thursday, and a girl is sitting in the dining hall, trying to eat something before she goes to her counseling session. She feels nauseous and isn’t sure if it’s because she nervous or if it’s because she needs to eat something. After … Continue reading Sharing My Dark Thoughts

We Share A Name and A Life

This piece I wrote a little over a year ago. It is the first real writing I ever did as a depressed and anxious teenager trying to figure out the mess that is my brain. Originally, it was a harsh letter written in first person, but after revisions and editing, it became somewhat of a … Continue reading We Share A Name and A Life